Eighties hate-ies: Revisiting Fashion's Despised Decade

Folks over thirty-five, I have news for you:  THIS is what young people think of when they think of Eighties fashion.




And this:



And this!  ("Eighties" theme parties -- do you believe it?)



Well I was there, and that is NOT the Eighties I remember.

This is the Eighties!  (courtesy of Vogue)

































To be Eighties style you need at LEAST three of the following (not one of which is a crucifix, a bustier, or anything pink):

1) BIG shoulders -- BIG!

2) Jewel tones

3) A V-shaped silhouette

4) Angular architectural shapes

5) sculpted, moussed hair (bonus points for double processing)

6) heavy, frosted eye and lip makeup

7) oversized everything

8) wide belts

9) gathered sleeves, yokes, skirts, handbags, shoes!

10) big clunky jewelry

Beloved middle-aged contemporaries of mine, please add whatever you think I've missed.

What is it about Eighties style that makes it so despised?  It's interesting how many people think Eighties style is all about Madonna, Madonna, Madonna.   She helped to create one (very) popular look.



Let's not forget about these fashion icons:











Again, I ask you:  WHAT was (is?) so embarrassing about Eighties fashion?  Is it the scale of it all: the big shoulders, big accessories, big hair?  Is it the Reagan-era pretension of big jewelry, gathered cap sleeves, and prissy shoes and bags?  Is it something else entirely?

I mean, the decade WAS preceded by the dust-ruffle midi skirt and followed by grunge -- was it really THAT bad?

So, readers-over-thirty-five and anyone else who has an opinion on the matter (ok, I guess that's everybody), let's get to it:  What makes the Eighties the Hate-ties?  Please be specific.  Who's more guilty of unpardonable fashion violations: Molly Ringwald or Linda Evans? Cyndy Lauper or the cast of "The Facts of Life?"

I believe it is may be time to redeem the Eighties.  Based on yesterday's comments, I know there are a few closet Eighties aficionados out there, mainly Aussies.

Will you help me, can you help me, mates?