Aged or Ageless? You decide!

Gentle readers, do you look your age? 

I know I'm fitter than many of my contemporaries and probably look a little younger, bald pate notwithstanding.  This is the result of conscious choices I've made for more than thirty years -- to exercise, not to smoke or drink excessively, to learn how to handle stress more effectively, to avoid baking in the sun, to eat right.  And some of it is genetics too.

That said, no one is confusing me with a thirty year old.  (No, no, I insist, they're not!)

Folks, how do you feel about people who present themselves as somehow beyond aging?   How about the people below?

I've chosen a group of celebrities because they're probably familiar to many, but I'm sure most of us know, or have known, people like this who aren't in the public eye.

I do not know any of these celebrities personally and my impression of them -- like yours if you have one -- is the result of reading about them, seeing them on TV, and looking at their work (their professional output I mean, not their plastic surgery).

Mamie Van Doren had a brief and undistinguished Hollywood career as a Marilyn Monroe clone in the Fifties and Sixties.  If you've ever seen the 1958 Doris Day film Teacher's Pet then you've seen Mamie in action, performing "The Girl Who Invented Rock 'n' Roll" number.  Most of her films were of the Sex Kittens Go to College variety.

Well she's still around today and still looking....how, exactly?   Quite a bit like her old self, or rather young self -- or somebody.  Next year Mamie turns 80.

We all know Hugh Hefner of Playboy fame.  He'll be 85 pretty soon.

Carol Channing, 90 -- Hello, Dolly!

Jack Lalanne, 97!

This is the 80+ crowd, the unarguably very old.

How we feel about how they present themselves says a lot about how we feel about aging, particularly in America.  I chose these four people because, though they're not typical since they're all in the entertainment business to some degree, they are our role models, even if we consider them negative role models.

They're all what I consider the "fighting age all the way to grave" crowd.  They're still out there working it.  Carol has a new album.  Mamie's still posing nude on her website.  Jack is still promoting juicers and Hugh is still partying at the Playboy Mansion.

Inspiring?  Exhausting?  Something in-between?

Does gender matter?  Do we feel differently about the old guys than we do about the old gals?

In a league of her own was the legendary Mae West, another "ageless" wonder.

Remember Sextette, Mae's last film (which she wrote and produced) in which she played youthful bride Marlo Manners at age 84?  The reviews were scathing.

George Burns, on the other hand, hit his peak of popularity when he was well into his Nineties and was much beloved, perhaps because he embraced the role of old coot rather than resisting it.

That never say die attitude seems particularly American to me, since American culture seems to be so uncomfortable with getting older and giving in (to anything).  Our approach to aging seems to be Fight it! 

I remember reading a review of Germaine Greer's 1991 book The Change: Women, Aging, and the Menopause, where she was quoted as saying (and I paraphrase) that it felt empowering to shift from focusing on being an object -- which always puts you at the mercy of others' interest -- to being a subject. 

What do you think, wise readers?

Does this quest to preserve youth inspire you?   I like the idea of doing what you love for as long as you can do it, but I'm not sure how I feel about someone like Mamie.  Maintaining that hair alone looks like hard work, yet she obviously enjoys being a sexpot so why not?

Do you think aging the Mamie way is a sign of health or denial?  Can a degree of denial contribute to healthy aging?  Can you still be a sex kitten at eighty?  How about ninety?

Or is it really none of our business what these people do?

Are you only as old as you feel, looks notwithstanding?

What say you?

"Age Appropriate" Dressing

I made a kind of off-handed joke last Sunday about the saying that goes, "if you were old enough to wear it the first time around, you're too old to wear it the second time around."  (I think this originally applied to mini skirts.)

Yesterday, a few of you pointed out that my 1941 dress pattern was a rather matronly design.  While I recognize it's not particularly youthful, it doesn't exactly scream dowager either.

Then I read an article Gertie linked to recently, about prom dresses too mature for the teens who (want to) wear them.

Do most of us still make distinctions like these today?  I happen to think that -- at least here in America -- we do not, or not so much.  We seem to be living in a sort of "anything goes" period style-wise, where sixty-year-olds routinely dress like teenagers and teenagers routinely dress like streetwalkers.  Personally, I do not have a problem with this -- but then again, I'm not a parent.

Clothing choices are obviously complicated and their meanings can be so subjective it's hard to make sense of them any longer.   Not that many years ago, the display of a woman's ankles was considered provocative.  Today, I think we've lost our ability to be shocked; we've seen it all -- literally.

While I'm of the "whatever floats your boat" persuasion, it does bother me that so many styles today seem to be derived from pornography (e.g., hooker-wear) and prison (e.g., sagger pants). 

It's not that I think there's anything intrinsically wrong with the garments themselves -- loose pants and short-shorts are literally meaningless -- but within the context of our society, I see them as indicators of a coarsened and degraded culture that openly romanticizes prostitution and violence.

I think most of us (we'll see if I'm right about this) are of the "if you still got it, go for it" school, i.e, if you can still pull off a look and you feel comfortable in it, that's all that matters -- or should matter.  We admire (or are told to admire) people like Cher, who in another era would have been put out to pasture or been relegated to Marie Dressler roles.  Good for her! we think (or do we?).  Too bad Cher is also the poster girl for plastic surgery.

There is something so refreshing about seeing an old (whatever we consider old today) person dressing in a way that looks unmistakeably adult.  It's an acknowledgment that we aren't always young and needn't try to look young.  We can look nice at any age.  (I don't like the word "attractive" because it suggests that we must always be thinking about attracting others.  At a certain point, enough already!)

The alternative to this -- while I may admire the commitment and discipline required -- exhausts me.

So I ask you, readers:  Does "age appropriate" mean anything anymore?  Are there things you won't wear, not because they don't fit well, but rather because they look either too youthful or too mature?   If so, upon what do you base your decision: a family member's judgement, a book on style, or just your own sense of what looks right to you?

Do you think this applies to men too or just to women?

Are we better off in this "freer" time or rather under more pressure to maintain the illusion of youth longer?

Dig in!